i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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