im drinking this country out of the recession.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
