no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
