i think i have herpe
just one?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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