You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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