is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
