The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
