I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
