I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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