Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
