Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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