You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize