wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
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