you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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