today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
