I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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