You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
