Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
