is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
