yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
