does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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