Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
