he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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