some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
