marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize