I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
