I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
they need to just BURY HIM!
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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