Pappa wants mamma naked
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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