dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
