Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
