Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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