I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
