All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
