I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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