Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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