need another drink. this is the easiest way
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
