last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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