it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
The beer is more important than you right now.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
