Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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