yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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