found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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