if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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