It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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