dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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