omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
