..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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