i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize