im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Watching her eat just hurts me
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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