their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
