Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
